Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Getting old is painful....

Actually, I'm not so sure that that's true. I think getting old is less painful than trying to stay young.
I've recently had to add going to the gym on a regular basis to my cycling in order to offset the creaking, the groaning and the widening that comes with old age. (I'm sure my love of sweets and beer has nothing to do with this phenomonon)

On your first visit to the gym,(aka the torture pit) you're given a "complimentary" session with a personal trainer. (aka hilda the masochistic man hater)
I have several issues with this....
first....there's nothing "complimentary" about making you stand on a scale in front hundreds of young, healthy, gym rats, then measuring your body fat with calipers that obviously lie since I'm sure it's scientifically impossible for a persons body to be made up of 98.2% fat

Secondly....they say they're glad you're there and they look forward to your coming back regularly....after which they try to kill you! Not in the figurative sense either....literally. I'm sure Hilda would have enjoyed seeing my heart and lungs spontaneously combust leaving me a quivering mass of 98.2% fat lying prone on the floor.

Lastly, who do they think they're fooling with their "motivational" little snippets....good job! you're doing great! only 10,000 more reps!! you're almost done!! And my personal favorite....what doesn't kill you makes you stronger!!! But, what if it DOES kill you?? That would really suck wouldn't it? (unless you're Hilda and that's the highlight of your day...."Ha! I killed another member - that makes 7 this week)

Although, I must say....once I got out of bed 3 days later, I did feel stronger

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